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I think there is a specific culture or penchant for 'naming and shaming' in the UK that is designed to make people feel safe. I think it was brought about by a couple of tabloids and is influencing local culture, workplaces, schools,

neighbourhoods in symbiosis. When I studied 'Pride and Prejudice' we learned about the function of 'free indirect

speech' which is basically talking about you not to you, and is a very powerful tool in profiling and shaming. What's not more British than that. Lol.

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I got an impression that the importance of shaming must be deeply embedded and go far back, because so much of law and public enquiries and so on depends on it. Is it actually relatively recent?

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In the UK, bullying is defined as "The repetitive, intentional hurting of one person or group by another person or group, where the relationship involves an imbalance of power. Bullying can be physical, verbal or psychological. It can happen face-to-face or online." Shame, on the other hand, is "A feeling of embarrassment or humiliation that arises from the perception of having done something dishonorable, immoral, or improper." Bullying can cause shame but it isn't the same thing. Let's call bullying what it is, and not invalidate people's lived experiences by saying it isn't bullying unless it's physical. That's like saying it isn't sexual harassment if you weren't touched.

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First, I apologize for upsetting you and for evidently getting some things wrong.

I've been thinking about your comment while out on an errand. Clearly you understood me to be saying that bullying always involves a physical element. I didn't say that. It does look to me like shaming is an especially prominent element of it here. But more to the point, I came across as saying that bullying and shaming are the same thing. I accept they aren't, that bullying is bigger and multifaceted and intense, and I am sorry I dealt with all of this badly.

When I look up "shame" in dictionaries such as Cambridge, the British definitions put more emphasis on what you said (perception of having done something [...] improper). American definitions at such sources as Merriam-Webster include that but also include a condition of humiliation, disgrace, contempt or loss of respect (which can occur even if a person doesn't feel they've done anything wrong).

I still sometimes find the gap between USA and UK culture baffling. I really put my foot in it this time. Sorry!

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